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LIFE GOES ON

As a fork in the road sprung a leak in my life a few months ago, it left me reevaluating things and thinking what is important to me? Of course, there is family—this includes my pack of animals—and friends at the top of the list. I would have to say that creating peace, love, and compassion in my heart comes next. If I cannot bring these to my heart, how can I for someone else? I would also have to gain wisdom and the courage to apply these things into my life.

That being said, two things come to mind. First, two faults that I have at the moment are procrastination and lack of motivation. Two qualities that make it very difficult to get things done. This is weird considering my background as a Marine. If anyone knows a Marine you know they lead a disciplined life. At least I know I did when I was on active duty and up unto my depression. My best bet is to get back to a routine every day to try to develop consistency. However, it seems the harder I try the harder it is to do. MEF is telling me otherwise. What is MEF you may ask? Well that is the little voice in the back of my mind saying all the negative things that hold me back; MEF—My Evil Friend. I borrowed that from Ed in the book The Buddha, Geoff, and Me.

Second, I am looking for an anchor. In my past, as I have said before I have been a disciplined human being, however, since my recent recovery from depression, anxiety, and a failed relationship I feel I am in a tailspin, out of control, out of focus, and lacking motivation. I need something to put my life back together and to have meaning.

I never was a believer in GOD this is why I turn to Buddhism. The Christian traditions did not have anything for me. I have done research—as you know from my previous posts concerning My Journey in life—and I am looking to get involved but have no idea which tradition of Buddhism. My only insight is my own research online and reading books. There are not a whole lot of resources where I live. It frustrates me that there are so many different traditions, which one do I follow? In my research, I have found Jodo-Shin, Vipassana, Kagyu Tibetan, Zen, Bon Tibetan, Soka Gakkai, Vajrayana, Mahayana, Pure Land, Theravada, and Nichiren. I am sure there is more but these are just to mention a few. I read about or come across a new tradition daily. Each tradition has its minute differences but all have the same basic beliefs. Maybe I will see what I can find around my city and start there.

If anyone has insight on any of these traditions or others, I would be gladly appreciative if you shared your knowledge and experiences.

My next step is to learn meditation. I have meditated for about a week and it looks promising. I still have a lot to learn.

Life is not going to stop still while I recover; I have to keep going…LIFE GOES ON! I am excited to see what is around the next corner or fork in the road.

Peace

True Hero. A young man, an act of bravery to save others, the ultimate sacrifice. My condolences to the family and friends of Cheng Changjiang, a true hero.

Kindness Blog

By the time he returned to the water to rescue the third child, a local man, Wan Sun, 31, had rushed to help.

Sun said: ‘He handed me the 11-year-old and I dragged her to the shore, but when I looked for the young man I could not see him. He must have slipped in deeper water.

‘When we pulled him from the water he was dead, there was no chance to save his life.

‘He gave his life for the children, he was a hero.’

Paying tribute to their son, Cheng’s parents, said he had gone to the popular spot to relax after getting stressed over his recent exams.

Father Ling Wu said: ‘It was typical of him. He would not think about putting others before himself.

‘I am proud of him but also devastated.’

Source: daily Mail

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September is Gone! Where Was I?

WOW!  Is September gone already?  I have not been doing much of anything since Mom died.  It seems like I have just been occupying space going around in a vicious circle.  I feel like I am getting things done but actually I have accomplished nothing.  Reading very little of the blogs I like, no writing, no posts on my blog of my own for about a month now.  I have let things outside of me get the best of me.

I have been working at my J-O-B and how fitting that the project that I am working on is called Zombies.  That is the best word to describe me for the past 6 weeks.  But I think it goes further back than that.

Since 2007, I have gone from being almost laid off—oh man was that stressful—to a relationship that did not work to depression to anxiety to depression again to mid-life crisis and then just…emptiness.

Back on August 15th, three days after Mom passed, I wrote about Life and what is actually important.  Since then I guess I have been trying to find myself.  It was an internal struggle, but a struggle I had to experience.  Then I came across this quote from George Bernard Shaw, “Life isn’t about finding yourself.  It’s about creating yourself.”

clip_image001Well, it is time for me to get out of my funk.  It is time to set my life straight, put my priorities in order and move forward instead of staying stuck in the mud.  I may not know where I am going but that does not matter.  I know where I have been and I know where I want to go.  For now, I will just live in the moment and start creating.

I have started reading a book called The Buddha, Geoff and Me by Edward Canfor-Dumas.  A fellow blogger referred this reading and I am finally going to sit down and read it.  It is a very interesting book so far.  I will let you know how it turns out in a later post.

Here is to creating!

Peace!!!

Giving is The Best Communication

Very touching, must see…

Kindness Blog

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Random Acts of Kindness Caught on Film

I love it when this happens. It fills my heart with love, joy, and happiness! Watch the video and you too will experience the feeling.

Peace to you all!!!

Kindness Blog

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MeticulousMick has nominated me for the Versatile Blogger Award.  Thank you, Mick.  Check out his blog for wonderful pictures, cultural facts, and he probably knows a lot about Ireland.  Which is where my next vacation is going to be, I just don’t know when.  Maybe Mick can give me a few pointers of places to visit.

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Now a little bit about me:

  1. Considering from my last post where I said I don’t like to talk about myself, I sure am talking a lot lately.
  2. I like a good wine, good beer, and good food.  As for the beer it has to be either micro brewed or foreign.  I don’t much care for the Bud, Miller, Michelob, or any of those kinds.
  3. I love to travel to experience the culture, the food, the people, and the beautiful lands.  This world is so beautiful I want to see it all.
  4. I am an insomniac.  So when I cannot sleep I get up and write.  But then I can’t stop so I end up staying up all night until it is time to go to work.
  5. I am a computer geek.  I have 4 computers at home, one of those is for work.  I like to have the most powerful computer I can get my hands on.
  6. I was shy when I was a child, but the Marine Corps changed that in me.
  7. I learned how to ski when I was in Japan.  I was on the beginners slope for all of about 5 minutes.  I snuck out of that class and went to the tallest slope and just went for it.  What a rush that was.  I was surprised I didn’t have any broken bones after that day.

Okay, that is enough about me.  A big Thank You once again, Mick.

Peace!!!

Thank you, Kristen! The Sunshine Award

Kristen has nominated me for the Sunshine Blog Award.  Thank you, Kristen.  Check out her blog, Author Kristen Hope Mazzola.  She is a wonderful writer and I love her work.  She has a book coming out in November, be sure to put it on your reading list.

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Okay, so now some stuff about me:

  • I have been in the computer field for almost 35 years.  There were no laptops back then.  They called them portable computers, but they were not as small as the name may suggest.
  • I am not a morning person.  All those years in the Marine Corps getting up before the break of dawn, you think I would be.  Nope, not me.  I love to sleep in.  Makes it somewhat difficult on the days I have to go to work.  If I didn’t have my coffee or 5-hour energy drink I would be miserable until noon.
  • Love scary movies.
  • My cats and dogs run the house.  They just allow me to rent a room from them and oh yeah I have to do all the cleaning, cooking, and such.  I love them all the same.
  • In my last post I revealed that I was adopted when I was 12.  I recently found all my birth brothers and sister through Facebook.
  • I find it difficult talking about myself.  I’d rather talk about something else.
  • I graduated high school on time considering I missed the first 3 quarters of my freshman year.
  • My mother had to sign for me to enlist in the Marine Corps because I was only 17.
  • I started writing poetry when I was 17 but never took it seriously.  They are probably hidden way back in the corner of the attic where no one dares to venture.
  • It is said that I am a half-breed but do not know for sure since the adoption records are sealed.  I have tried to get them unsealed but no luck so far.

Well there you have it, more about me.  Thanks again, Kristen.  I really do appreciate it.

Peace!!!

 

I have been nominated for The Versatile Blogger Award by Hari, Hari’s Got Tales!.  Thank you Hari.  Check out his blog, I love reading it for his story and to find out what he is cooking up next.  Brain food and tummy food, great stuff!

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I don’t follow award rules but I will share seven things about myself.

1.  My first memory was my 5th birthday.  I remember getting a big blue VW Beetle.  At the time it was the best day of my life.

2.  I was adopted when I was 12 years old.

3.  I was in the United States Marine Corps for 8 years…Ooorah!!!  Semper Fi!!!

4.  I love the color red.  Red for passion and for all the blood shed around the world.

5.  Traveled to many places in my life and my favorite place so far is Japan.  I still have many places I want to travel to though.

6.  I can be meticulous to the point it borders on OCD.

7.  My nickname is “Mr. Hollywood!”  That name has been following me around for many years.  It started in 1985 when I was stationed at Camp Pendleton, California.  I was always playing volleyball on the beach in Oceanside or La Jolla.  I would come out in my shades and the first phrase said, “Hey Mr. Hollywood!”  So the legend began.

 

Thanks again, Hari.  I appreciate it.

Thank You Ajaytao!!!

First of all let me address all the kind words and the condolences for the passing of my Mother.  It helps a lot when there is people that can be supportive in times of need.  Whether it be personal friends, Facebook friends, or blogger friends.  I love you all.

As all of my blog friends/followers know from my last post, I have been going through a rough month and I am in the process of getting back to somewhat of a normal life.  However, after a loss do you ever really get back to normal.  It does take time.

Part of my process to try to get back to normal is getting back to my writing and blogging.  In looking through some comments from all of you I have noticed I have overlooked nominations for awards by my fellow bloggers.

In the month of August, Ajaytao nominated me for a total of eleven awards and I would like to acknowledge them now and say thank you, Ajaytao

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2 Nominations from Ajaytao

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2 Nominations from Ajaytao

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2 Nominations from Ajaytao

wonderful-team-membership-award1

Nomination from Ajaytao

sunshine-blog-award

Nomination from Ajaytao

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Nomination from Ajaytao

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Nomination from Ajaytao

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Nomination from Ajaytao

A big Thank you.  I appreciate it.

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